"Comic perfection, one pixel at a time."

02/06/2014

A truly great person never puts away the simplicity of a child.
So you're saying it's okay that I still sleep with a teddy bear and nightlight?

A man's dreams are an index to his greatness.
I dream about sleeping in late, showing up to school unprepared for a test, and fighting off the many various things trying to kill me. Behold my greatness.

You will receive unexpected support over the next week. Accept it graciously.
Double coupons came in the mail!

You lose nothing by asking, and there is a chance to gain something lasting.
That's not true. There is plenty of dignity to be lost in asking questions.

Discover the talents within yourself
I have a large amount of ancient money in me? That doesn't sound healthy. I'm gonna need to see a surgeon.

A tub and rub will change our day.
Um!! I... uh... think we should just stay friends. And I'm going to go... somewhere else now. Bye.

A photo doesn't capture your charm
Hey, wait, are you saying it doesn't show up because I have "inner" beauty? Are you calling me ugly?!

A modest man never talks to himself
…? Never talks about himself? Eh, whatever. A modest man never talks to himself. Sure. Why not. Makes as much sense as other fortunes.

"Oh man, is that smell me?" Tom said quietly to himself. "I shouldn't have skipped the shower after my run."
"Tom, are you talking to yourself?" Jeff had heard his murmurings. "You think you're so important that you can talk to yourself? Learn some modesty, you arrogant jerk."

Meet the Characters

meet the charactersMeet Chris, Billy, Eis, Derek, and all the other characters

Eis' Hero Guide

eis hero guideSince Eis is such a superb hero, he's giving out lessons.

Fortune Cookies

“You will soon witness a miracle.”
Spam will be made with quality meat!

The RPG

rpg gameSeven great heroes quested to defeat evil... they all died

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