Team Tanuki

Derrek: Look here, Evil Scientist...we represent Evil Wizard Insurance...If you agree to the low, low payment of "not horning in on the evil wizard's territory", then we, in turn, will ensure that more "accidents" don't happen to you, got it? Capice? Savvy?

Derrek: Hello there, Brilliant Sir; we're from the Nobel Peace Prize Selection Committee. We've finally recognized your remarkable genius! On behalf of the Committee we'd like to formally apologize for scoffing and shunning you in the past, and invite you to this years event. However, to reserve your invitation, would you please come over hear and sign the paper my identical partner is holding.