"Comic perfection, one pixel at a time."

Adventure 1: But I Don't Want to be a Pirate

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Squeekipeep feels bad for hurting Martine so badly. He didn't know Martine couldn't take the pain, so he decides to help Martine wake up by shouting, "Hey, Martine, wake up!" And? of course that doesn't do anything. Good job, Squeekipeep. 

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Above deck:

Warchef grabs Red Reaper's shoes and whips up a batch of hardtack. Yum. He hands one to each clone and stuffs one in Red Reaper's mouth.

Lucky again slashes at Derrek, but he dodges.

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Below Deck:

The Captain leaves to ponder Martine's offer.

Pipi picks up the broken pencil and sharpens both ends.
Pipi: "Master Swordsmouse, I see the reason in your thinking and I hope once this battle is won, we shall be allies. But I cannot serve on a ship possibly owned by an albino Frenchy who whips girls while their backs are turned!" Then armed with a pencil stub in each hand, she turns on Martine, but he dodges.

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Out in the ocean:

Before Martine's portal closes, Stu dives through.

Gilbert tries swimming to the ship but can't even manage a simple doggy paddle and starts to drown.

Midna warps in out of nowhere and brings a life raft with her to save Pooky and Gilbert.

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Below Deck:

Turning down the Captain's offer, Pipi screams, "Freeeeee-dom!" and jumps away from the sword and tries to stab him with a pencil. The Captain parries with his sword, snapping the pencil. 

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Those still on the ship:

Red uses Glare of Death on Lucky, but he dodges away.

Derrek climbs out of the mess of the clones that piled on top of him.

Warchef uses a sponge cake to dry himself off.

Lucky slashes Red with his hook and she passes out.

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As the automated wash system turns on, Pooky, Gilbert, Stu, and Martine are swept into the ocean.

As he flies through the air, Pooky shouts, "I NEVER EVEN  WANTED TO COME ON THIS SHIP!!!!!!" He crashes hard into the water and passes out.

Stu is about to share the same fate but screams out "NOOOO!" and lands in a thick bed of seaweed.

Martine opens a portal to his crossbow inside the armory.


Meet the Characters

meet the charactersMeet Chris, Billy, Eis, Derek, and all the other characters

Eis' Hero Guide

eis hero guideSince Eis is such a superb hero, he's giving out lessons.

Fortune Cookies

“You will soon witness a miracle.”
Spam will be made with quality meat!


rpg gameSeven great heroes quested to defeat evil... they all died

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